Thursday, October 28, 2010

Please join me in praying for this sweet, sweet family. They are such wonderful people, and I know that they are glorifying God even in the midst of these hard times.

Ashley Campbell is a dear friend of mine from elementary and middle school. Her dad was the pastor at the first church I ever regularly attended, and she was the reason I started going there. Ashley's sister Sarah was like a little sister to me- she is precious. Anyway, their dad Rick was diagnosed with myeloma in March and they just found that it is active again.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010


God's telling me to rest, and I haven't been listening. Probably why I'm now sick... No time for [deep] blogging tonight!

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. "
-Matthew 11:28
I want to be where You are
I’m running into Your arms
And I will never look back
So Jesus, here is
my heart

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
-Ephesians 4:29-32

Monday, October 25, 2010

You can have all this world... just give me Jesus.

Even though Jesus is all that I need- He gave me some pretty awesome friends for my time here on earth.

Sunday, October 24, 2010

I want to love because You loved.

That last post when I was talking about how I am feeling so drained... dumb. dumb. dumb. Although it is true- I do feel very drained, the answer is not to stop loving someone. The answer is to be more filled. It's sad that I typed those selfish things out when I knew all along that they were selfish. WHY do I give into the flesh so often?

To all my friends and to all the people that I love (whether you love and pursue me or not)-
I want to love you like Christ loves you, and I am so sorry for letting my selfishness get in the way of that over and over again. It's not about me. It's not about me feeling dried up. It's about Jesus, being filled with Him and because I'm so filled with Him, overflowing with Him and His love.

I want to love because He loved. Not because I want to be loved in return. I am loved unconditionally by my God and that's all the love I need.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

It's the little things in life that mean the most.

This is going to be a sporadic post with lots of random thoughts because that describes my life... and my brain. I really am losing my mind. My brain has pretty much decided to quit working this semester- I write everything down and still forget things, I am always out of it (making me even more awkward than I already am), and I haven't been a good friend lately.

On that note... I know this is really selfish of me, but I just can't put forth the effort that I have been into some friendships anymore. I literally can't. It's so draining when I get absolutely nothing in return from some people. Especially when I feel like they don't care about our friendship at all. If it doesn't matter to them, maybe it shouldn't matter to me so much. Yes, there are people that I still feel led to pursue and don't *shouldn't* expect anything in return (which should always be the case probably), but those people that I'm not feeling really called to pursue a friendship with right now... I'm just going to let it go. I hate that and it is so so difficult for me to say (will be even harder for me to actually do), but I have to do it because I have so many other things (God, other relationships, Young Life, school) I need to focus on. I have to get rid of some of the "drainers" in my life so that I can be filled in order to pour out.

Something that I'm looking forward to that I absolutely love- Panera with Jessie tomorrow. This time once a week seriously keeps me going. Time with her always makes me think about life, really consider the things I'm doing (whether they're actually worthwhile or not), and she always points me to the Lord. My time with her is always rich (NOT exhausting!). I don't know how it happens or how she does it- yes, I do... She lets God use her and speak through her. Incredible.

Jamie and I went to Bearden's Young Life tonight to hear Lindsey speak and she was AWESOME. Wow. You could hardly tell she was nervous at all and her message was great. She spoke so much truth to those high schoolers. It is amazing to watch God use my wonderful friends in such cool ways to share His love. I am SO PROUD of this girl.

Sunday, October 17, 2010

I thought I would have lots of blogging time this weekend since five of my closest friends were at one of the most wonderful places of earth- Windy Gap. Although I missed them very much, I enjoyed praying for them and the high schoolers they were hanging out and sharing Jesus with! and somehow managed to keep myself entertained- being really sick for two days, spending time with my team- dinner and a movie and going to the CAK game, spending time with my momma, getting a traumatizing haircut, going on walks, hanging out with friends from high school, and going to church.

Today at church Tim Miller spoke about "Undeniable Forgiveness." I had actually heard this sermon before at The Walk... He used the scripture about the woman caught in adultery (John 8), and emphasized that it's only at the cross that Jesus says we don't owe Him anymore and that He offers us forgiveness.

2 Corinthians 5:21
God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.

Colossians 2:13-14
When you were dead in your sins and in the uncircumcision of your sinful nature, God made you
alive with Christ. He forgave us all our sins, having canceled the written code, with its regulations, that was against us and that stood opposed to us; he took it away, nailing it to the cross.

"If the God of Heaven and Earth has chosen to forgive you, who are you to hold anything against yourself?" -Scott Cagle (I really liked that)

John 8:31-32
Jesus said, "If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free."

It doesn’t matter what You’ve done;
It doesn't matter where you're coming from
Doesn’t matter where you’ve been,
Hear me tell you I forgive

You’re not guilty anymore,
You're not filthy anymore,
I love you, mercy is yours
You're not broken anymore,
You're not captive anymore
I love you, mercy is yours

Can you believe that this is true,
Grace abundant I am giving you
Cleansing deeper than you know,
All was paid for long ago

There is now therefore no condemnation
for those who are in Jesus

You are spotless
You are holy
You are faultless
You are whole
You are righteous
You are blameless
You are pardoned
You are mine

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Brian Rakeem Bangura

This is my infamous African boyfriend...
the one that wanted to see MY dance moves
the one that said "I'm going to miss you so much. This is like a Titanic moment." when I was leaving camp.

Here are some snippets from our conversation on facebook today:

Brian- how long is your hair now please don't cut it i love your hair....
Me- Hahaha it's a little past my shoulders.

Brian- thanx dee.what time is it in the u.s.?
Me- 10:34am

Brian- what on coming for breakfast.lo.lhere its 4:35

Me- Haha I'm in class...
naughty naughty dee ha ha ha.i miss the y.l guys esp you...

Although that part of the conversation is just kind of entertaining and a little humorous... some parts of the conversation remind me of how different life is for them in Zimbabwe. Once again I am reminded of how blessed I am. It's hard not to feel bad for them, but to be honest, most of them don't know what poor conditions they live in. They have so much more focus on family and life than on technology and instant gratification- I'm actually a little jealous of that part.

Here are some of those parts of the convo:

Me- How is your family?
Brian- they are mmmh alright.i dont know about my mom.i havent seen her in ages.but i think she's ok........
Me- and how are your friends?
Brian- oh they cool.although lately i've been spending a lot of time in isolation.

i'm going through a lot of stuff in my life dee and i just decided to be alone so i can find myself spiritually coz i seem to be losing my bearings

i guess its because i wish my dad was here to guide me through some things in life but he's not here.its hard being a man without fatherly guidance and a whole lot more.....

thanx dee its was cool chilling with you and talking to you my time is almost up

Miss it. So much.

Monday, October 11, 2010

Thankful this weekend is over. It was a looooooong break. Usually that would be good, but this one was just draining.

Also glad I finished that dang thing that I had to turn in today (Chelcie's making me be secretive about it!).

Sunday, October 10, 2010

All to Him I owe.

Oh praise the One
who paid my debt

and raised this life up
from the dead

Friday, October 8, 2010

Always Forever

You are the love I need
You are the air I breathe
You are my love, my life
Always forever
I would lay down my life
Just to be by You side
You are my love, my life

Always forever

You are the grace that covers my sin
You're everything- the beginning and end
You have my soul, my heart, and my mind
You have my love and all of my life

Hallelujah forever

Thursday, October 7, 2010

1 John 3:16-20

My sweet friends that I went to Africa with have an ongoing thread on Facebook just catching up, planning a reunion, and talking about how we want to continue to give to our dear friends in Africa...
Ryan sent us this verse to read and pray over:

This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers. If anyone has material possessions and sees his brother in need but has no pity on him, how can the love of God be in him? Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth. This then is how we know that we belong to the truth, and how we set our hearts at rest in his presence whenever our hearts condemn us. For God is greater than our hearts, and he knows everything.

Wow. I often think that I am "a broke college student," but in reality I have so much. I may not have a ton of money right now, but even the money I do have can be used on things so much bigger than Chick-fil-a and 3 Spoons. Beyond that, though, I have so many material possessions when I compare my belongings to what my African friends have.

(their oven/stove)

(their dryer)

(their sink- a good distance from their 'house')