Thankful

Have I mentioned recently how much I love my small group? Because I do... a lot. The girls in there are just so encouraging, loving, and nonjudgmental. Most importantly they have a huge desire to be more like Christ- and it's so great to have a small community of believers with the same goal. Then we have Paulette to lead us and teach us. She is the wisest woman I know, and I just learn so much from her. I cannot express how thankful I am for this group.

I'm sitting here preparing my talk for Monday and just reading through verses that I've read a million times, I am overwhelmed by the love of my God. Thankful for those reminders.

Last night after small group I went to the guys' soccer game. Jamie met me there and brought me clothes to change into (I was still in my interview clothes). So thankful for this sweet friend and her being willing to do that for me. Even more thankful for her being at Sharp Top with me this weekend. I wouldn't have made it without her. She was so encouraging all weekend... and just seeing her smile would remind me that I was not alone. This was a reminder of how grateful I am that we get to do ministry together at CAK- it has grown so much since this time last year. Even though our ministries look completely different, we are in it together... and that is such a blessing.

Then Jamie and I went to dinner and Chelcie joined us. Thankful that she's going through the application/interviewing process with me and thankful for her blog yesterday that reminded me that I am not even close to big enough to mess up God's plan. He has it all under control.

I'm getting ready to go to lunch with my best friend Matt. Thankful for a chance to finally get to spend time together. Especially since he's leaving me so soon. Thankful for our friendship in general that started so randomly and has grown so much just in the past few months.

Later today I get to hang out with the other wonderful person in the above picture- Nicole! Thankful for no Wednesday night classes so that I can spend these afternoons with her. And even more thankful for her friendship.

Also so thankful for all the encouragement from so many friends yesterday before my interview.

Praying this week for discernment about spring break plans. Also praying for God to speak through me to these high schoolers on Monday night.

You can have all this world... just give me Jesus.

Even though Jesus is all that I need- He gave me some pretty awesome friends for my time here on earth.

I want to love because You loved.

That last post when I was talking about how I am feeling so drained... dumb. dumb. dumb. Although it is true- I do feel very drained, the answer is not to stop loving someone. The answer is to be more filled. It's sad that I typed those selfish things out when I knew all along that they were selfish. WHY do I give into the flesh so often?

To all my friends and to all the people that I love (whether you love and pursue me or not)-
I want to love you like Christ loves you, and I am so sorry for letting my selfishness get in the way of that over and over again. It's not about me. It's not about me feeling dried up. It's about Jesus, being filled with Him and because I'm so filled with Him, overflowing with Him and His love.

I want to love because He loved. Not because I want to be loved in return. I am loved unconditionally by my God and that's all the love I need.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.

It's the little things in life that mean the most.

This is going to be a sporadic post with lots of random thoughts because that describes my life... and my brain. I really am losing my mind. My brain has pretty much decided to quit working this semester- I write everything down and still forget things, I am always out of it (making me even more awkward than I already am), and I haven't been a good friend lately.

On that note... I know this is really selfish of me, but I just can't put forth the effort that I have been into some friendships anymore. I literally can't. It's so draining when I get absolutely nothing in return from some people. Especially when I feel like they don't care about our friendship at all. If it doesn't matter to them, maybe it shouldn't matter to me so much. Yes, there are people that I still feel led to pursue and don't *shouldn't* expect anything in return (which should always be the case probably), but those people that I'm not feeling really called to pursue a friendship with right now... I'm just going to let it go. I hate that and it is so so difficult for me to say (will be even harder for me to actually do), but I have to do it because I have so many other things (God, other relationships, Young Life, school) I need to focus on. I have to get rid of some of the "drainers" in my life so that I can be filled in order to pour out.

Something that I'm looking forward to that I absolutely love- Panera with Jessie tomorrow. This time once a week seriously keeps me going. Time with her always makes me think about life, really consider the things I'm doing (whether they're actually worthwhile or not), and she always points me to the Lord. My time with her is always rich (NOT exhausting!). I don't know how it happens or how she does it- yes, I do... She lets God use her and speak through her. Incredible.

Jamie and I went to Bearden's Young Life tonight to hear Lindsey speak and she was AWESOME. Wow. You could hardly tell she was nervous at all and her message was great. She spoke so much truth to those high schoolers. It is amazing to watch God use my wonderful friends in such cool ways to share His love. I am SO PROUD of this girl.

Always Forever

You are the love I need

You are the air I breathe
You are my love, my life
Always forever
I would lay down my life
Just to be by You side
You are my love, my life
Always forever

You are the grace that covers my sin
You're everything- the beginning and end
You have my soul, my heart, and my mind
You have my love and all of my life

Hallelujah forever

Stuck in my head. And I'm perfectly fine with that.

So I wanted to bold the parts that I liked in this song... but they're all so good and so true... so I'm just going to bold what's really applying to my life at this time.

You are good You are good
When there’s nothing good in me

You are love You are love
On display for all to see

You are light You are light
When the darkness closes in

You are hope You are hope
You have covered all my sin

You are peace You are peace
When my fear is crippling

You are true You are true
Even in my wandering

You are joy You are joy
You’re the reason that I sing

You are life You are life
In You death has lost it’s sting


Oh I’m running to Your arms
I’m running to Your arms
The riches of Your love
Will always be enough
Nothing compares to Your embrace
Light of the world forever reign


You are more You are more
Than my words will ever say

You are Lord You are Lord
All creation will proclaim

You are here You are here
In Your presence I’m made whole

You are God You are God
Of all else I’m letting go


My heart will sing
No other Name
Jesus

Well that was still most of the song... Oh well.
Just resting in these truths!


Just because I love pictures. This one in particular right now. And I love the people in it. Also I just like adding pictures to posts...